In order to be able to live in London, there’s no doubt that most of us have to work… Having a job tends to mean awaking at an ungodly hour, fumbling around with sleep-crusted eyes and a delirious mind, and participating in what can only be described as the terror-inducing-crack-of-dawn-morning-commute to work…HELP!
1. Ok, great slept through my (8) alarm(s) again.
2. Oh well, already running late now so may as well rest my eyes some more.
3. So much for going to the gym. Again.
4. I’ll set 3 snoozes and that should be enough time. I’ll just skip breakfast.
5. Maybe there’ll be a crisis and our office will be evacuated and work will be cancelled.
6. Or a power cut over the whole of London…yes that’d do it…*tries light*…damn it!
7. What the f*ck is that noise?
8. Are the builders on the scaffolding next door DRILLING?
9. I thought builders were renowned for not doing any work…quite clearly that is a VERY wrong assumption.
10. Ok, get up, get up, get up.
11. One, twooo…
12. 5 more mins. The drilling isn’t actually that bad. Almost therapeutic in fact…
13. Neither are the sirens. Quite used to those.
14. Bloody London.
15. I love London. Let’s think about how great London is for a while…that’s a totally acceptable excuse for staying in bed a bit longer.
16. It’s also important for my own health and sanity not to travel in the heart of rush hour.
17. So really i’m just being sensible.
18. Mmmmm this bed is comfy.
19. Surprising considering I nicked it from that skip round the corner.
20. Right, come on then, up we get…
21. Jesus it’s cold.
22. Too cold for a shower. And too late. It’s fine. I’ll just put loads of deo on. No one will know.
23. Are these socks clean? *Sniffs* YOLO…
24. Shiiiit, is that the time? Righto, hair and make up on the tube it is…
25. Whyyyyyy didn’t I go to bed earlier. I didn’t need to watch that 8th episode of Narcos.
26. Oh goody, the streets seem a bit quieter, maybe i’m so late that i’ve missed rush hour.
27. Spoke too soon…
28. Why doesn’t TFL just cancel all the trains so I can go back to bed?
29. Just going to squeeze in here…good head resting place for another little eye rest….
30. I wish i’d had breakfast.
31. Lady with the bag, if you knock me one more time i’m gonna…
32. Oh LOOK, a seat! Now I can get an extra half an hour sleep in…
33. As if that person’s in gym gear. People are mental.
34. Mmmm, ok sleep isn’t really happening. It’s too smelly. Eye shut is good though…
35. I’m definitely going to grab a coffee. Need coffee. I’ll only be 15…25 minutes late.
36. I should probably get breakfast with my coffee otherwise I won’t be able to function until lunch.
37. Mmmmm lunch. Maybe i’ll get that nice noodle dish from the street van as a treat seeing as life is so hard having to get up early every. damn. day.
38. Don’t look at me like that, you’re not old enough to get my seat.
39. Ok, they’re still looking…shut your eyes again and look painfully tired so they feel sorry for you.
40. I am painfully tired.
41. Ok, here we are…you can do this…you’ve got your coffee and now it’s only 3hrs 45mins until lunch.
42. My eyes hurt i’m so tired.
43. Think I could go to the toilet to rest them again for a minute?
44. Yes, good idea…i’ll show my face first and then go to the toilet.
45. Crap, i’ll have to take my make up too, definitely forgot to do that.
46. What is the absolute earliest age you can retire?
47. 3:30 until lunch…
48. I’m so tired…
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