13 Signs You’ve Lived in London For Too Long

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When you’ve lived in London longer than six months, whether you like it or not, you’ll find yourself changing from ‘human’ to ‘Londoner,’ a very different species indeed…


1. You no longer understand the real meaning of the word ‘cheap’.

‘£4.50 for a pint? That’s pretty reasonable!’


2. You take for granted that you have friends from all over the world.

And that some places outside of London are actually pretty cultural barren 🙁


3. You’ve forgotten how to drive.

And that outside of London tubes don’t even exist!!!!


4. You aren’t surprised when there’s a delay on your tube line.

And you *barely* even get mad about it anymore… *barely*.


5. You forget to stop and smell the roses… so to speak.

People travel thousands of miles to see the buildings and sights you ignore on your daily commute.


6. You’ve got the tube map down.

But any other map and you’re f*cked… Ask me to locate Milton Keynes?


7. Nothing surprises you anymore.

Pop up shop for doggie cocktails, cool. Cafe exclusively selling cucumber smoothies, you bet. An app trying to connect tech-savy toddlers, sure thing.


8. You take for granted the ridiculous amount of really really ridiculously good looking people around you.


Seriously, the London tinder game slays all.


9. You measure distance in terms of tube stops.

‘It’s about 5 stops away mate.’


10. You’ve perfected the art of ‘freebee dinners’ from food markets.

‘I’ll try one of those.. ooo and one of those please!’


11. You’ve learnt how to avoid tourists indefinitely.

That includes eye contact, cameras and small children.


12. Being broke is a constant state.

What is this ‘disposable income’ you speak of?


13. You find yourself willing to spend £5 on a bowl of cereal.

Well it DOES come with strawberry milk AND a chopped banana!


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      1. And by that logic yours too.

        When I read this list I didn’t actually take it in but thought: “I’m reading another list from some click bait that I yet again swallowed.” I still compulsively scrolled to the end though,,, as you can see.

        Oh yeah, it’s also a Friday night. Whoopee me.

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