By now everyone is aware that to buy/rent in London is akin to exposing your bare bottom to a tank full of hungry piranhas; pointless, painful and ultimately it will never end well. Over the years we’ve seen the adverts for properties go from a bit dodgy to downright dastardly. If you perhaps live in one of these hell holes then firstly, who hurt you and secondly well done. At least you still live in London…?
1. The weeny teeny house = £235,000
2. The “I’m actually a glorified shed” house = £280,000
3. The Harry Potter hole house = £40/week.
If you’re the type of person who doesn’t say anything when someone stands on your foot for your entire Tube journey whilst you slowly cry rivers inside then this place might be for you. It’s a £40 a week ‘loft conversion’ (read: A loft. A spidery, windowless loft.) in Paddington and the fact that the specifications read ‘no history of claustrophobia” says all you need to know.
4. The “I hope you like peeing in the shower” house = £520/month
5. The Lazy Man’s dream house = £680/week
6. The ‘Iceberg Mansions’ in Chelsea and Kensington = £12,000,000
If there’s one thing we can take away from this list, it’s this: estate agents take more creative licenses than E.L. James.