This Cute Cafe Bakes The Most Beautiful Biscuits In Town

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Biscuiteers

All for one and one for all at Biscuiteers! Ah, who are we kidding, there’s no way we’re stopping at one…

We are, as a nation, obsessed with biscuits. But before you reach for the chocolate digestives once more (I’m saying this for my own benefit as much as yours), check out the treats on offer from Biscuiteers. Well, treats maybe isn’t a strong enough word. This really is pure unadulterated biscuit porn.

Biscuiteers
Photo: @biscuiteersltd

Biscuiteers are batty for biscuits, and they don’t care who knows it. Whereas you might treat biscuits simply tea-dunking fodder, Biscuiteers see their creation as works of art, fit to be displayed in the world’s tastiest museum. Each biscuit they create is carefully hand-iced, and the results are pretty wonderful.

Biscuiteers
Photo: @biscuiteersltd

They’re rather on point when it comes to pop culture and world events, too. Here’s the eighteen(!) biscuit box they put together for the royal wedding.

Biscuiteers
Photo: @tracycoco11

Biscuiteers also have a literary bent, which resulted in these creations for the Bailey’s Women’s Prize for Fiction. Happily, this lot found their way to Secret London HQ, and after exhaustive research, I can confirm that they were utterly delicious.

Biscuiteers
Photo: @biscuiteersltd

Just as pretty as the biscuits are Biscuiteers shops, which could have wandered out of a Parisian arrondissement. As it happens, you’ll find them in Battersea and (unsurprisingly) Notting Hill. This is where you can stroll in for a coffee and a biscuit, or just cast an admiring gaze over what’s on offer. If you wanted to get a little more hands-on, you can join one of their icing lessons, and ice like a true Biscuiteer. Rumour has it that they taste better when you ice them yourself – though personally I don’t think I have enough patience for this…

Biscuiteers
Photo: @gcarroll23

The biscuit beaus also run an online ordering service, where you can personalise your biccies and have them delivered anywhere in the world. Everything from “get well soon” to “will you marry me?” is on offer here, making this a particularly tasty messaging service. And if you can’t say it by biscuit, then you can’t say it at all.

Biscuiteers
Photo: @biscuiteersltd

And now, with a heavy heart, I return to the office biscuit jar, knowing that what awaits me will forever fall short of the Biscuiteers. It really is a tough life, folks.

Location: Notting Hill – 194 Kensington Park Road, W11 2ES. Nearest station is Ladbroke Grove. See it on Google Maps. Battersea – Opening hours: 10am-6pm (Monday to Saturday), 11am-5pm Sunday (Notting Hill) or 10am-5pm Sunday (Battersea).
Price: There’s a massive range in price, depending on whether you buy one biscuit, or a big ol’ set.
More information: on their website.

Featured image: @biscuiteersltd

Alex Landon

Alex Landon

Although Alex spent most of his life in Somerset and Durham, London is (almost) in his name, so he relocated to the capital and fell in love with it. Now going by the moniker 'Secret Landon', you'll find him eating all of London's street food, lost in a bookshop, or shouting at his beloved ice hockey team, the Minnesota Wild.