Rich People Who Know How to Exercise and Socialise (Episode 2)

Tom Livingstone Tom Livingstone

Rich People Who Know How to Exercise and Socialise (Episode 2)
Episode 2: The Gang go to Barbados

You’re so excited. You’ve been waiting for this moment all week. You’ve all but forgotten the fact that they gave away the entire storyline for this episode in the preview at the end of last week’s show, and now you can’t wait for this week’s real life drama. It’s like how you would live, if you were stinking rich. Your phone is at the ready to message friends with updates on how sexy each character looks in each scene, a packet of digestives sits by your side. Cool Air dies away, and the episode begins.

Humphrey and Edgar have just been to an electrode muscle toning class. They could have done some kind of normal exercise, but that’s not really their style, so instead they went to this electrode toning session, so ahead of the trend. Now, slightly sweaty, but still surprisingly attractive, they ring their friend Jemima on speakerphone. Jemima pretends to be surprised by their call, but when the camera cuts to her she seems completely relaxed in full makeup and revealing lacy dressing gown. Asked whether she is ready for Barbados, she of course answers that she is, as she doesn’t appear to have a full-time job or any real commitments in London.


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Humphrey, Edgar and Jemima have arrived in the most lavish of Barbados villas. The men are dressed in open linen shirts, while Jemima sports just a bikini and denim shorts, an outfit she may well have travelled in. Cocktails have appeared from nowhere (a dedicated team just off screen), and now the 3 engage in meaningful discussions about how life is better with cocktail umbrellas, pondering what it would be like to live without cocktail umbrellas. During this time, it quickly becomes apparent that Jemima is deeply in love with Edgar. Apparent to everyone except Humphrey, who sets about trying to woo the London lady. When night falls, Humphrey and Edgar come to blows about the matter, with Humphrey perfectly delivering the lines of ‘mate, but mate, it’s bro code’ and ‘dude, you knew I’d asked her to hang out* with me’.

(*hanging out is like a date, but much more chilled).

[Humphrey throws a lobster at Edgar]

Jemima, torn by her situation, is saved by the arrival of Lucinda, who promptly joins the drinking before sleeping with both Edgar and Humphrey.

Short preview of next week that for no apparent reason gives away the entire plot for the episode

Jemima is completely oblivious to Lucinda’s digression, and continues to offload her emotional baggage onto her friend, whose guilt is written all over her pouting face. Suddenly, Jemima receives a phone call from a friend back home who has no reason to be aware of any of the events of Barbados, but seems to know everything anyway, and enlightens Jemima as to the entire situation. Back in London a few days later, Jemima is pushed to breaking point, and even wastes a whole gin and tonic by throwing it over her so-called ‘friend’.


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