(Not Quite) Fifty Shades Of London Grey…

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We apologise if you can never look at the Gherkin in the same way after this.

 

1. “I know they’re not famed for their size, but there’s a considerable length on all of them,” I told an impressed Abigail.

A photo posted by Antoinesc_b&w (@antoinesc_bnw) on

 

2. I stood there, eagerly waiting for 3 minutes, thinking of another gap I wouldn’t mind.

fifty-shades-london
[Flickr Kristian Dye]

 

3. “What lies behind this door”, the voice overhead announced, “is a mixture of pleasure and pain. But mostly pain.” I shuddered.

A photo posted by Natalie Bell (@nea.bell) on

 

4. I wanted to dive right in, but I didn’t know what I’d catch…

A photo posted by Nikolay Bogdev (@nikolay_b) on

 

5. “Take me on a ride. Right here. Right now.” I told him.

 

6. My inner goddess was desperate to get out from behind the fence and take all of you in.

A photo posted by Pico (@ribeiropico) on

 

7. Now I know why they call you Big. And it’s not just after your bell.

 

8. I bit my lip when I saw those sexy, irresistible curves.

 

9. I’ll be here, waiting for you to open up for me. 

A photo posted by Camille (@camille.lesenne) on

 

10. Baby, you’re always so wet.

A photo posted by Jude Ar (@itsjudear) on

 

11. I smirked. “The things we can do,” I said, “When I have you all to myself…”

 

12. “Sometimes, when I’m riding you, I think it’s never going to end.”

A photo posted by David Preston (@thewzrdharry) on

 

13. “I can make a sinner out of a Saint”, I purred to Paul.

 

14. “Be careful,” Abigail warned, “I’ve heard that all of London’s birds have had a splash around in that…”

A photo posted by 🍿Yulia (@hey.cool.kid) on

 

15. I resisted the urge to thrust us both onto the seat – there was a pregnant woman present. 

 

16. “I have a taste for the old and young. It’s a good job I get both.”

A photo posted by Tim Sonmez (@timsonmez) on

 

17. They said he was the biggest. Oh boy, they didn’t lie.

 

18. … Just the tip. It’s all anyone can take (a picture of).

A photo posted by Sabrina (@sabr.nita) on

 

19. And then, he finally showed me his…

cockfosters

 

I think that’s quite enough. If we got to 50, you’d never be able to get on the Jubilee line again.

Georgie Jones

Georgie Jones

After graduating, Georgie decided to drastically break the mould and moved to Clapham, where she quickly picked up an Australian accent. She loves bloody Marys, small plates and dogs and strives not to be a walking cliché - so goes running instead.

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