What Living In Chelsea Is Really Like: Expectation VS Reality

share on:

Beluga, brunch and someone named Toff? Find out what really goes down in SW3.


Expectation: The Bluebird Café

mic gif

The original MIC hangout. Reclining on a white sofa, covered in a fur rug and gazing out at the Made in Chelsea ‘bois’ who immediately come over to offer you (a) sex on the beach.


Reality: Peter Jones Top Floor Restaurant


Instead of not getting a seat at Bluebird, visit the lesser known eatery on Sloane Square. At six floors up, the view is even more stunning than Jamie Laing’s hair. What’s more, the menu is having a revamp, soon to be taken over by Benugo.

…and if you really want that fur rug, you can find it under ‘Homeware’.


Expectation: Working out at barrecore

Bend and stretch @gemmabasswilliams1 @barre_core 💪🏻

A photo posted by Millie Mackintosh (@milliemackintoshofficial) on

£28 a class with the likes of Millie, Cara, Jordan or Pippa stretching out in front of you.


Reality: The outdoor gym in Battersea Park

[Wiki Commons]

Completely free; it’s got monkey bars, balance beams and the added bonus of no Victoria Secret models making you question your entire existence.


Expectation: Shopping trip to The Kooples on KR

Average price of a vest top £150.


Reality: Oxfam Boutique


Find a Kooples top for 20 quid. May require stalking the shelves for up to two months prior.


Expectation: A day shooting in Sussex

Casual trip to your third home via your fourth car.


Reality: World’s End Nurseries

[Robin Sones via Geograph]

Where you are more likely to find a plant called ‘Funda’ than a person.


Expectation: Romantic ski weekend in Chamonix

Vintage ski-suits, flirting in hot tubs and snow the colour of Jamie’s hair.


Reality: A couple of hours in Chel-ski

London’s largest indoor ski centre. With hi-tech slopes and an alpine bar, who needs to spend a grand on the real thing…

Abbie Moujaes

Abbie Moujaes

She came, she wrote, but she never wrote a bio.