As a fun way of online dating without actually online dating, it’s no surprise that every Londoner and their mum seems to be on Tinder. With a playground this big it’s no surprise that you’ll meet some strange characters. Maybe we’re just too caught up in the fast paced city or maybe we’ve all lost the talent of actually talking to someone but hey – here’s the 6 guys you’ll meet on Tinder in London.
1. The Travelling Guy.
[giphy]He’s probably from America or Australia and totally has that gorgeous tan and long blonde hair thing working for him. His bio will definitely include something like ‘Ozzy in London’ just so he’s sure you know he has an accent and therefore he’s instantly irresistible, (apparently). He’s friendly enough and will ask you out for a drink, but we all really know he just wants to get with a British girl before he flies home.
2. The Hipster Guy.
[giphy]His profile pictures show a moody, pouting guy around the ag of 25 (smiling is main stream anyway). His bushy beard, large rimmed glasses and eyebrow piercing remind you how much cooler than you he is. He’ll say he’s only there to promote his art but then ask you on a museum date anyway. If you chose to declince he’ll be sure to remind you that he’s only using Tinder ironically anyway – GOSH.
3. The Worryingly Young Guy.
[giphy]His bio says 25 but his face says 15. He’ll shower on the compliments and bring out the cheesiest chat up lines that he’ll clearly seen on outdated sitcoms and is too naive to realise they don’t actually work. You’ll ignore his double messages but he’ll still send you emojis and date invitations. At least this all stops around 10pm, presumably cos it’s past his bedtime.
4. The Essex Lad
[giphy]You’re feeling particularly thirsty so you expand your radius to 18km and within seconds they arrive in their hundreds. These tanned central line warriors have spent more time looking in the mirror that talking to a potential crush and this shows quite dramatically. They’ll take you to a fancy bar but ask you to take a pic of them with their cocktail ‘and make sure you get my watch in the shot!’
5. The Dick Pic Guy
[epictimes]This isn’t necessarily a London thing, more of a Tinder thing genereally. There isn’t much to say about this guy apart from be careful who you’re swiping. One wrong thumb movement and you’re invited in the guy who will bombard you with unsolicited nude pics and aubergine emojis.
6. The Booty Call Guy
[giphy]He’s kinda like a horny Dracula. A close relative of the Dick Pick Guy but awake exclusively in the dead of night, you’ll hear this guy only in the early hours of the morning and his communications are short, sweet and consistent. ‘You up?’ and ‘Wanna hang?’ being his choice of courtship this guy is a real charmer, maybe he’ll even offer to pay for your Uber home.
7. The High Flyer Guy
[giphy]His profile pics consist of him with tigers and bottles of Moet and expensive cars. He’ll take you to some fancy bars and insists he picks up the check, which normally we’d dislike cos #feminism but when the guys this much of a tool we’ll let him contribute to the terrible date by funding our expensive cocktails.