With a big city comes big responsibilities… to not pay for stuff and get round London faster. Here’s a few tips you probably already know because you are a legend.
1. Public Libraries always have free loos.
2. And free recycling bags.
3. Itsu give you a free banana with any coffee.
4. They also do a half price sale, half an hour before close.
5. King’s Cross Toilets might cost 30p but just across the road at St Pancras THEY’RE FREE.
6. Or the one outside the first class lounge at King’s Cross is also free if you’re feeling particularly classy.
7. Hammersmith Broadway charge 50p for their toilets. And they are shit.
8. Waitrose give you free coffee every day, and not just a watery americanos… actual lattes! Just sign up to get a card.
9. Same goes for Peter Jones card, but you only get a few free coffees and cakes throughout the year. (Mmm, cake).
10. Head to Camden Market for free samples (we recommend Mr Piadina and his flatbreads).
11. This February you can get a free London Pride beer every time it rains (not long left for this one so keep on the ball).
12. If for some inexplicable reason you’re venturing outside London, stock up like it’s WW3. Do not buy anything on a train carriage. Ever. Coffee for £3.50? Waitrose would be outraged.
13. You can feast on free WiFi if you hover outside Starbucks, Boots, EAT, Pret, Maccie Ds… etc etc.
14. Stand where the yellow line is faded (or just hover around people in suits who look like they know what they’re doing) to get to the doors first on the Tube.
15. TfL will give you a free one-time ticket if you’ve got no money but you need to get home — just fill out a form at the ticket office.
16. You can also go up to £1.50 negative on your Oyster card!
17. Or just…
18. Really need a sit down? You can attend high-profile criminal court hearings for a little respite at the Crown Court.
19. If people are bothering you on the Tube, any number of these non-essential things to take on the Tube should help distract you.
20. Or just sort of look a bit weird and twitch or something and they should leave you be.
21. Go to Battersea Dogs and Cats Home to have a free puppy therapy hour.
22. You can get free refills of filter coffee at Starbucks and just sit there all day.
23. There are public pianos all over London that you can play and make everyone’s day a little better.
24. Always carry around a bag of stale bread in case you see any hungry pigeons.
25. Just kidding, never feed the pigeons.