You’ve all made at least one of these, don’t lie. No seriously, don’t lie. We’ve heard far too many people saying ‘South-wark’ for it not to be the case. Some of you are natives! DO NOT LIE TO US.
1. You’ll ask someone for directions.
2. You’ll try and slide your Oyster through the ticket slot rather than tapping it.
3. You’ll try and use Boris Bikes as your only mode of transportation
4. And decide one minor crash/sprained wrist later that enough is enough.
5. You’ll pronounce Holborn, Ruislip or Southwark wrong.
6. You’ll try and make All Bar One cool again.
7. You’ll bring your car.
8. And try and park it in the first available space.
9. You’ll try and see one “cultural experience” a week.
10. And promptly decide that Netflix is culture enough.
11. You’ll run for the Tube (just wait 1 minute pal).
12. You’ll attempt to go to gym classes at least 3 times a week.
13. But realise you don’t actually have a bottomless bank account and settle for jogging.
14. You’ll download loads of London-based apps.
15. And only use City Mapper, TubeMap, Uber, Fever, (…and Tinder when you’re desperate).
16. You might try and walk home one evening from a night out.
17. 3 hours and two very blistered feet later you will never try again.
18. You’ll try and update your wardrobe to something more stylish.
19. Then realise that black jeans and a shirt work everywhere. EVERYWHERE.
20. You’ll search in vain for an Asda.
21. Your no-smoking ban will be tested. A lot.
22. You may try and get a part time job. Lol. Good one.
23. And you’ll try and save your money.
24. You’ll occasionally, occasionally think about leaving.
25. Biggest. Mistake. Ever. 🙂
*and you’ll stand on the left. HA. You thought we’d forgotten, no no, WE NEVER FORGET.