If you haven’t already realised from the steamy breath that accompanies you on your way to the tube in the morning, winter is definitely upon the capital. It’s easy to fall in love with the twinkly lights, high-reaching Christmas trees and boozy hot chocolates that come with the season, but it’s also just as easy to fall into bed with a snuggly blanket and a dozen new films on Netflix to binge. When Londoners do brave the elements and head into the cold, its safe to say it’s not a walk in the park…
1. Holy tits it’s cold.
2. No, but like, reaalllly fuckin’ cold.
3. Maybe my alcohol jacket will keep me warm?
4. Okay so I need a drink, or 7.
5. So that’s £70 down.
6. I should have just bought a better coat with that money.
7. Or all those Christmas presents I’m supposed to be saving for…
8. Hmmm another £25 for 4 mulled wines. Perhaps Mum will have to settle for that ‘free hugs’ coupon.
9. We’re definitely ordering the Uber before we get outside.
10. Where the piss is the pissing Uber?! It says it’s arrived and now I’m shivering my tits off.
11. How did I used to go out in my *youth* without a coat on?
12. On the tube, spine dripping: Why the jeff did I bring my bloody coat on the sweltering ride into hell.
13. BUT thank God for the Night Tube, I cannot walk home in this tundra…
14. Just remember to remember the Night Tube when you’re drunk and don’t get yourself a taxi.
15. OOOH! We should go to a cool winter pop-up.
16. The fake snow and Christmas lights will look GREAT on my Instagram!
17. Is it always this dark at midnight or is this an extra level of ‘winter’ darkness?!
18. Does anyone know of a 24-hour roast dinner restaurant?!
19. Or a cosy fireplace pub that’s still open at 4am?
20. Or a shop selling electric heaters and blankets?!
21. Maybe I should’ve stayed home.
Feature Image: Flickr – David D’Amico