We’ve all been there. Smashed at 11pm, making the impossible journey home; trying desperately hard to stay awake so we don’t end up in Morden, making best friends for life and scoffing our faces with McDonald’s.
1. Alcohol fuels the sweetest of friendships.
Random drunk woman on the tube had an iPhone 7 and was in tears that she couldn’t listen to music so she shared my earphones.
— Josh (@JoshAaronR) January 7, 2017
2. But it can often cause confusion…
*see’s a woman on the tube with a ‘baby on board’ sticker*
“She doesn’t look like a baby to me?”
Don’t you love drunk Lizzie logic
— Lizzie Penhaligan (@lizzylou652) December 23, 2016
3. And a significant change to our attitude.
Drunk me on the night tube: I love everyone!!
Sober me on the tube: I hate people get them away from me.
— Edward (@EKSainsbury) December 18, 2016
4. Check yourself before you wreck yourself…
Drunk man on the tube started talking to me so I pretended to be French and said ‘enchanté’ but it turns out he’s French and now I’m stuck.
— Lauren (@laurenlsexton) December 17, 2016
5. So that’s at least 99 times, right?
If I had a penny for every time I drunk cried on the tube. I’d still be drunk cryin on the tube except possibly with mcdonalds
— alison (@alisonokok) December 16, 2016
6. Drunkenness = dedication and perseverance.
Today I got into a debate with a drunk guy on the tube that took so long he stayed 10 stops too long just talk to me
— Luke Knott (@theLukeKnott) December 13, 2016
7. This guy sounds like he ‘definitely’ knows what he’s doing…
Travel news: Drunk man on the tube just yelled that he was ‘definitely Keith Chegwin’ then tried to start a fight before falling over.
— Ben Mars (@MrBenMars) December 9, 2016
8. Sometimes spell check is absolutely no use at all.
yes i am that drunk on of the tube eating a burglar king
— The Longest One (@thelongestone) December 9, 2016
9. Most people tell their friends how much they love them or cry over their exes. Not these guys…
“What’s your favourite type of risotto?” “No mate, fuck mushroom risotto” – painfully middle class drunk conversations on the tube tonight
— Georgie Cauthery (@georgiecauthery) December 9, 2016
10. This one is just, well… it’s just a bit awkward, really…
I kid you not, a drunk hipster on the tube pointed at the giant spot on my forehead and said “cultural appropriation” while tutting.
— ?Candy? (@candyowlgirl) December 8, 2016
11. Wine can bring about so many great opportunities…
Was wine drunk on the tube last night and some woman took my business card and asked if I would speak to youth offenders for career advice
— Michael (@michaeldh_) November 26, 2016
12. Hey, don’t we all?
I wish I had the same confidence and sense of reckless abandonment that the drunk men on the tube singing the Proclaimers have.
— Dominique Pope (@dominiquerpope) November 22, 2016
13. We all have that one friend…
I’ve got to travel back from London steaming drunk. If you see anyone on the tube slut dropping it’s me.
— Brighton Girl (@BtonGirlProbs) November 13, 2016
14. F*ck the system!
When you’re a bit drunk on the tube and you just smile at everyone and you know it’s a social faux pas but you just don’t care
— M A I S Y (@maisyosbon) November 11, 2016
15. Very enterprising, Jake.
Just bought a litre of water for 50p from Sainsbury’s then sold it to 6 drunk Scottish men for a fiver on the tube ?
— Jake #TeamLH (@jakehallam01) November 11, 2016
16. We all do questionable things when we’re drunk, but this…
A drunk man just threw a slice of ham at me on the tube, it’s so good to be home
— HANNAH (@Xhannah_linton) November 7, 2016
17. This will break your heart.
Drunk man has a very sad dream on the tube. pic.twitter.com/Kyhh9ULiIE
— Nabeena M (@NabeenaM) November 5, 2016
18. An easy mistake to make…
Actually have a fair bit of love for the guy on the tube who is so drunk he just squared up to his own reflection
— Andrew Silverwood (@AndySilverwood) November 5, 2016
19. Solid song choice.
Just saw a bunch of drunk guys sing Year 3000 to a man that had passed out on the tube.
— IsabellaPesina (@IsabellaPesina) October 29, 2016
20. We’re sure sober passers-by wouldn’t agree with this one…
The harmony between drunk people on the tube after 11pm on a Friday night is truly beautiful
— Pauline (@lil_p_yo) January 27, 2017
21. London, you are full of good eggs.
Some absolute random man on the tube just gave me a portion of chips. I’m very drunk so this is very welcome. I love London ?#nighttube
— Emma Kirrage (@emmakirrage) January 22, 2017
Feature Image: Rooney Wimms / @MrBenMars