When you woke up this morning and checked your phone for the Brexit poll results, you didn’t think that the movement to leave the EU would actually become a reality. And as thousands of Londoners are calling upon Sadiq Khan to become the president of an independent state, it’s clear London has been plunged into a state of serious “whaddaafuck”.
1. Wake up. Check phone. Shock.
2. B-b-but wait… before you went to sleep, you assumed it was all going to be ok?!
3. And now you can’t believe this crazy world.
4. You hopelessly checked other reliable news sources, just in case it was all a misunderstanding.
5. Then you see the vote demographic and location split…
6. And consider starting a petition to build a wall around the M25.
7. So an independent London state can become a reality…
8. We’d keep the city’s wonderfully diverse culture (and the Queen, of course).
9. Better still, we could drill our way around London and airlift it to somewhere hot on mainland Europe.
It’s important to just accept the result and move on, possibly to another country.
— Frankie Boyle (@frankieboyle) 24 June 2016
10. Or we could team up with Scotland and call ourselves ScotLond. It just works.
11. The tube felt extremely sombre on the way to work this morning (even more so than usual).
12. Because everyone knows the world is fucked.
13. And what’s more, we may now have to get a VISA just to see some sun.
— James Offer (@joffley) 24 June 2016
14. God forbid – we all know London doesn’t have a bloody leg to stand on when it comes to relying on good weather.
15. You look around the office and realise that at least 10% of your colleagues are from Spain/Germany/The Netherlands, etc…
16. You can’t help but feel ashamed of your country’s decision.
17. But Sadiq Khan is the dog’s bollocks and had a fantastic message for all.
18. There is one tiny glimmer of hope that we might be able to afford to buy a house in London, if the property prices fall…
19. But then you realise that the claim was probably just another lie…
20. Because the £ has taken a leap off the Shard and plummeted.
— David V. Johnson (@contrarianp) 24 June 2016
21. And we might bloody well join it, as the panic of what’s to come sets in.
22. So yeah, about that wall…
Featured Image credit: Michael Shaw