London can be a pretty terrifying place. Bizarre new pop-ups, horrifying prices and the hellish journey on the 2am night-bus might lead you to believe that you’re actually living in some sort of Halloween-town. (Cue the ‘This is Halloween, this is Halloween!’ song from The Nightmare Before Christmas stuck in your head for the rest of the day). Anyway, these frightful (and frightfully annoying) occurrences often make us feel like it’s Halloween in London every day of the year…
1. Seeing someone feeding the pigeons outside Kings Cross so that they no longer fear man and thus become unruly, aggressive beasts slowly reclaiming London as their own.
2. When someone gets on a crowded tube but chooses to sit right next to you.
3. Or sitting down in a tube carriage just as a guy gets on clutching a massive bag full of stinky, greasy food.
4. When a busker is playing the same three songs on loop outside your office window.
5. When your favourite market stall stops giving out free samples.
6. The scariest words you’ll ever hear ‘Replacement. Bus. Service.’
7. When you hear someone referring to London as ‘Landan’ or ‘The Big Smoke.’
8. When you’re kept awake at night by the screaming of foxes having sex.
9. Drunkenly falling asleep on the tube and waking up in Epping.
10. Meeting up with someone from Tinder only to immediately realise you’ve been tragically cat-fished.
11. When the cashier at Whole Foods tells you that your Mac’n’Cheese and two pieces of broccoli is going to cost you £8.90.
12. Agreeing to go to your friends house BEFORE they tell you that they live in zone 5.
13. Taking a wrong turn and finding yourself on Oxford Street around Christmas time.
Feature Image: [Visit London]